Spitting Mad

She remained glued to the bench, daring the Yeller to approach – almost hungry for an altercation. “Bring it on, bitch,” she thought…

Number Nine

Today was my 9th wedding anniversary. Nobody remembered. Not even me and Nick. Which was awesome! Because it means we’ve been together long enough that another year going by isn’t all that big of a deal. Ever since I got married, I’ve been looking forward to this stage of our relationship. I guess I felt…

What I Learned From Quitting Facebook

A word about self-confidence from the girl who (almost) shit her pants in 10th grade.  [sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]At 16, I came thiiiiiis close to being the first girl at Trinity Christian to crap her pants in the hallway. It had to have happened before… and it probably happened after I graduated… but, to my utter…

Poop Culture

Stop holding in farts, dear. You look like a blowfish. [sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]I’ve always been frustrated with the state of poop culture in America. In my early years, I always pottied with the door open. As an only child – a “single kid,” as my husband likes to say – of parents who insisted on…