Spitting Mad

She remained glued to the bench, daring the Yeller to approach – almost hungry for an altercation. “Bring it on, bitch,” she thought…

Number Nine

Today was my 9th wedding anniversary. Nobody remembered. Not even me and Nick. Which was awesome! Because it means we’ve been together long enough that another year going by isn’t all that big of a deal. Ever since I got married, I’ve been looking forward to this stage of our relationship. I guess I felt…

What I Learned From Quitting Facebook

A word about self-confidence from the girl who (almost) shit her pants in 10th grade.  [sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]At 16, I came thiiiiiis close to being the first girl at Trinity Christian to crap her pants in the hallway. It had to have happened before… and it probably happened after I graduated… but, to my utter…

Poop Culture

Stop holding in farts, dear. You look like a blowfish. [sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]I’ve always been frustrated with the state of poop culture in America. In my early years, I always pottied with the door open. As an only child – a “single kid,” as my husband likes to say – of parents who insisted on…

Prude Fashion

Giving boys ideas is satan’s work. [sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]Dressing myself has never been my strong suit (pun intended). Without a sibling to mock and cajole me into leveling up my fashion game, I was pretty lost. Which is, of course, why I had two children – so that they never have to suffer my same…

Making the Case for Compassion, Regardless of Reward

[sg_popup id=”1403″ event=”inherit”][/sg_popup]A friend of mine always stops at homemade lemonade stands. Little kids peddling exorbitantly priced cold beverages spark within her a desire to support the brave, entrepreneurial qualities in our younger generations. Not me. I speed right by those things. I’m the type of person you don’t want to run into if you’re…

Cannonball

Mother Nature always gets the last laugh. You’re better off learning to laugh along.